There are a variety of reasons why divorces happen. A husband or wife may cheat on their spouse, which is a dealbreaker for them. One of the parties may experience a decline in their health, and their spouse may no longer feel inclined to take care of them. The introduction of kids into the mix may have changed a husband or wife’s attraction to their spouse. These are only a few reasons marriages fail.
Many spouses might be unhappy in their marriages, but not all of them can agree that divorce is the best option for addressing their disappointment. In many instances, one of the spouses may prefer to seek counseling or pursue other last-ditch efforts to rescue their marriage. The decision to walk away from the marriage isn’t always a mutual one, and thus there may be a strong chance that presenting them with divorce papers won’t go well.
Why spouses don’t often see divorce similarly
One reason why one spouse hopes will be an amicable, uncontested divorce might end up a contentious, litigated one is a difference in perspectives about the relationship’s demise. One spouse may want to do what’s necessary to make things work, while the other may not.
Some psychologists argue that both spouses owe it to themselves to try to overcome their odds so that they don’t have future regrets. You at least owe it to your spouse to have a compassionate, respectful and calm conversation with them explaining your decision to walk away if that ultimately is your choice.
Is an uncontested or contested divorce in the cards?
Your spouse may respond in anger or become defensive if you blindside them with your divorce filing. They may be unwilling to discuss child custody, property division and other matters in the hope that you’ll rethink your decision to end your marriage. They may soften as you hold your ground and explain your reasoning behind walking away and ultimately be willing to negotiate a settlement on these matters instead of allowing a judge to do so for you.
The scenario described above explains the difference between a contested and uncontested divorce. You can employ strategies to have a say in the end of your marriage instead of letting a judge do it for you. You’ll want to take time to learn what they are.